The title of this blog comes from 2 country songs
What Hurts The Most by Rascal Flatts and Who you'd be today by Kenny Chesney
these songs have been playing on the radio alot and not just country stations and on my ituns/ipad too and i think its because im barley beinging the griving process, you see a year ago this month i lost 2 friends of mine and i havent accepted it, i have been in denial about both them being gone and what hurts the most for me was how close we were and how i know i should been a better friend and should have been there for them and i wasnt and the thing is i cant for life of me stop thinking of who would they be today and it kills me that i know i own some sort of responabiltly to their passing and in the end i put other things and other people in front of them but i never saw this comming
and my heart hurts so much it cant even begain to explain this
and i know over time i will gain peace with what happend but i also know it will take some time
i struggle with asking for forgiveness from God
when i cant forgive myself
and im hounted by their passing
i know their in heaven and their in a better place
but i wonder if i will ever get over the pain and the hurt
its been a year and i still feel like it was yesterday when all of this happend and the pain is still as fresh as ever.......
ellie and mindy you will never know what a profound impact on my life and life of all of those who you knew you, loved you and miss you, yall never hasted to put others first and help any body in any way a normal " hi how are" im good in passing was never enough you always wanted to know everything going on in everyones life you showed all of us how to love and live
you both made this world a better place to live and you made all of us who knew you how to be better people so thank you
forever loved and missed
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