WHY I HATE THE R WORD

WHY I HATE THE R WORD ( RETARD) 

I HATE THIS WORD I HATE EXIST I HIGHLY DISLIKE THE PERSON WHO INVITED IT 

THE REASON WHY I HATE IS THIS IT HAS AND STILL IS USED TO DESCRIBE ME BY OTHERS OTHERS WHO DONT KNOW ME WHO DONT MY STORY AND OTHERS WHO DO KNOW ME ( FAMILY TEACHERS K- NOW, "FRIENDS", CLASS MATES, TEAM MATES, ) 

BUT FEEL THE NEED TO LABLE ME THIS BECAUSE 

MY BRAIN WORKS DIFFERENTLY 

I HAVE DYSLEXIA, VISUAL/SPACEUAL DYSLEXIA, DYSCALCULIA, DYSGRAPHIA AND DYSPRAXIA 

ALL BUT THE DYSPRAXIA ARE LEARNING DISABILITIES THE DYSPRAXIA IS A MOTOR SKILLS PROBLEM 

I HAVE ISSUES HOLDING PENS/PENCILS BUTTONING SHIRTS/PANTS TYING SHOES  GRIPPING THINGS ECT WITH THE LDS I HAVE ISSUES, READING/WRITING/VISUALLY SEEING SPACES WITH STUFF/ DOING MATH/ PROCESSING   

BUT IT DOSENT MAKE ME LESS OF PERSON 

IT DOSENT MEAN I CANT WORK OR FUNCTION 

AND WHEN I GET CALLED THE R WORD IT HURTS 

AND MAKES ME SAD THAT PEOPLE THINK BECAUSE IM DIFFERENT IM NOW LESS OF HUMAN BEING AND DONT HAVE RIGHTS ( YES I STILL FIGHT FOR THEM ) 

AND ITS DISRESPECTFUL TO CALL MY SELF OR ANYONE THIS WORD 

IM ASKING MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY TO PLEASE STOP USING IT 

IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND MY DISABILITIES THATS OKAY BUT  DO NOT ASSUME YOU KNOW 

IF YOU HAVE QUESTIONS ASK ILL GLADLY TALK WITH ABOUT 

BUT STOP USING THE R WORD 

whats the point

I know i normally do not let the behaviors and other affect me for things I'm used to such as being made fun of for my size, my LD, the way look, talk, read, write etc but tonight the behaviors and treat of others has won out i just got home from the store carrying to paper bags and well i fell and lost the contacts of stuff in one bag (thankfully I'm ok but my ankle and foot are very score ) but any way my neighbor his gf and and a friend of theirs watched this take place and saw everything of course i watched herd them laughing ( will give credit at lest they were willing to do it in front of me and not behind my back ) i understand kids doing this i grew up it happening all the time from pre k to well today adult yes it happened in HS a lot and college but I'm not going to lie i don't understand how adults do this and are okay with themselves for doing this my neighbor his gf and her friend didn't bother to help they stood and watched me get up laughing at me the whole time why do we as humans make fun of each other what do people get out it i just don't understand so I'm asking that if ever see someone in my situation please either help them but at the very least don't make fun of them you just never know whats going on

can paint with the colors of the wind

the last few days well even weeks  i have been trying to understand  human beings and i have to realize that no matter how hard i try  i will never understand humans and i will never understand the want to change people  because someone is different on the outside  
let me explain we are the same on the inside  we all have a brain, head, eyes, nose, ears, arms, hands, legs,  we all organs, ligaments, muscle tissue, muscle, heart, we all bleed  got it okay this how EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE PLANT IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so here is shocking news as much as we are the same we are  DIFFERENT  I know this shocking and a bit much to handle to take a moment and breath……………………………………………
okay you ready for me to go on  are you sure if are than read on if not stop now 
 there a people who are white, black, latino, Native American, Asian, Middle Eastern ( sorry not know the proper name please forgive)   than there people who have physical disabilities  such as MD,MS, lots physical disabilities  may be have down syndrome  
than there people like me who have the "hidden disabilities" i.e. the ones you can't see but see the side effects such as Dyslexia(all forms of it) Dysgraphia, ADD, ADHD, Autism, and so on than there are people who are strait, gay, transgender,   than there are people who are christian, atheist,  jewish,  Muslim faith which is great  there are people who deal with mental issues and illness  these differences are what make us who we are as people  I WILL NEVER EVER EVER UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE WANT TO FORCE OTHERS TO CHANGE BECAUSE  THEY DONT UNDERSTAND/DONT GET IT OR DONT WANT TO ACCEPT IT  that is there problem  and its very sad i have recently herd of people trying to cure autism and dyslexia  why would want to cure something that can't be cured its trying to cure someone of being gay or curing someone of being  black or curing someone of  having  green eyes instead of brown and when i get asked would i cure my dyslexia and dysgraphia  t people always seemed shocked when i say HELL NO  you see if it weren't for my learning disabilities i would NOT BE ME  I'm not saying they define me because they don't but  i  wouldn't have tired as hard  and worked as hard in school i wouldn't have fought for mainstreaming for myself and so many others and proving that because I'm dyslexic and dysgraphic I'm stupid and if you feel this please unfriend  i have examples of amazing people with dyslexia and dygraphia  any way i probably wouldn't have gone to college or be a special ed ta  and i wouldn't have love and compassion i have also i wouldn't be as kind and loving as i am  truth be told i would be selfish sob i would not stand with people and fight for what is right  as in people like me belong in regular ed classes so i might need a little help with work and i might learn differently whats wrong with that??? whats wrong if someone loves someone of same sex what if people of different races or faiths marry whats wrong with this?????? i love my friends who are gay and proud of some friends who are putting on a play in okc that they are taking a lot of ridiculous heat for and to them I'm sorry people are stupid just know y'all are strong and I'm proud of you and i love my friends who do and don't have disabilities  and love my friends who have mixed races  and or faith relationships  good for y'all  also instead of trying to change people to fit into what you think is normal why not trying to see how the other person sees life and the world who know you may learn something you never knew you never knew   are differences are what makes us and nature the colors of the wind can/will paint with them  
just remember life needs all colors in crayon box not  just your favorite colors those just make them better  

ADOPTION

NOVEMBER IS NATIONAL ADOPTION AWARENESS MONTH 
THIS IS VERY NEAR AND DEAR TO MY HEART 
FIRST LET EXPLAIN IF YOU AND DO HAVE YOUR OWN KIDS GREAT  THAT MAKES ME HAPPY BUT PLEASE RESPECT/ HONOR THOSE PARENTS WHO CHOOSE TO ADOPT  BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO PAY LOTS OF MONEY GO THROUGH LOTS OF PAPER WORK TO GET APPROVED TO RAISE A CHILD/CHILDREN  FOR PEOPLE FOR WHAT EVER REASONS  CAN NOT RAISE THEIR OWN KIDS  AND THIS DEAR TO MY HEART BECAUSE MY FAMILY WOULD NOT EXIST WITH OUT    YOU SEE MY MOMS PARENTS ( MY KIKI AND BOPS) CHOOSE TO ADOPT HER WHEN SHE WAS BORN LATE 40S AND  THAN AFTER TRYING COUPLE OF TIMES WITH NO SUCCESS AND  HER ALMOST DYING SHE AND DON ( AKA FATHER)  CHOOSE TO ADOPT MY BROTHER IN THE LATE 70S AND ME IN THE EARLY 80S AND WITH OUT THIS WONDERFUL WONDERFUL THING CALLED ADOPTION I WOULD NOT HAVE HAD A FAMILY AND THERE SO MANY KIDS IN  FOSTER CARE HERE IN THE US  AS WELL AS AROUND THE WORLD THAT NEED A HOME  FOR ME PERSONALLY IM FOR A PARENT(S) WHO CAN AND ARE WILLING TO ADOPT DO  NOW IF LOOK AT PICS OF MY FAMILY  YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW WE WERE ALL ADOPTED  
ADOPTION IS A WONDERFUL WAY TO MAKE SURE KIDS ARE SAFE AND RAISED IN LOVING HOMES  AND IT ALSO A WAY TO HELP YOUNG MOMS AND WOMEN WHO ARENT ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF THEIR KIDS FIND GOOD HOMES 
ADOPTIONS CHANGES LIVES FOR THE BEST 
IM SO THANKFUL I WAS ADOPTED 

I HAVE A DREAM - MLK - 50 YEARS LATER

50 years ago today  in American History a civil rights leader named Dr. Martin Luther King gave a what become a very inspirational speech  called "I HAVE A DEAM" at the wall of America in front of the Lincoln memorial  in Washing D.C.  where he talked about having a dream about  white and black kids living together and having equal rights  fast forward  50 years later although our country has come a long way  we still have a long way to go and i believe MLK dream would also include and does those who are gay, bi, transgender, people with disabilities,  and those who with lower income and all faiths and beliefs and religions igher income  and im proud to say we have come along but we also have a long way to go and we are working for it i just wish people would stop looking at the outside factors but judge people by their hearts and be willing to work if they are able if they are not than do what they can and i wish we stop the blame game and i wish people would stop being scared of people who are different because the truth is we all different none of us are the same and were all different and thats what makes us great 
i see MLK dream speeding to all these groups and maybe im dreamer but i know im not the only one and i hope one day the future we can look back say just see people  for who they are and not what they are  may be instead of judging people will learn from others who different because thats how we learn thats how we grow and thats how we love and respect everyone because that will go so much further than hate what if all gave this a try  i wonder what kind of world we would have 
i know i fight everyday for my friends who are gay i fight for myself with disabilities to educate people and help them learn and see why things are important these are human rights things to have equal rights 
i say if you can go try to learn from someone new or someone you dont know every well 
but most of all love and respect everyone because everyone has there own battle  and you dont know what they have been through 
and when i look around i still think to myslef what a wonderful world 
this my verison of Dr. Martin Luther King's speech "I HAVE A DREAM"

one year

one year ago today my life turned upside down i got a phone call no child ever wants to get telling you  your mommy yes at 30 i still call my mom mommy  get over it  but the call had told she had been in roll over accident in Florida  and  she was on the way to hospital i did not sleep the rest of day and i was ready to jump on a plane if need be and i was soooo greatful for 2 of 3 other women with my mom who kept us updated and took care of her and thankfully she is fine one year later but its scarry one of the biggest lessons learned be careful  who trust and let drive your car and never ever drive when your super tired  but today i can say im thankful she is okay and i still have her :) 

3 angels

I know in my last blog i called people out for not letting what they say match their walk which is fine but i want to show gradatude for  3 of my friends who  have been at my beckon call pretty much 24/7  to which im beyond greatful who help me by eaither warming up my food or bringing me food they help me change clothes, wash my self and my hair  they help stand up when im too weak to get up on my own they help get out of the apt and help get out  a couple of times a week and help do chores and  always make sure im okay and im soo thankful for all the help  they are amazig people im so thankful to have them in my life i honestly do not know how i would have gotten through all of this surgery and this last year to be comptly honest and i could not ask for better friends im soo thankful for them and all that they have done they are angels in my book 
and they know who they are 
so to you 3  thank you